Family
Spotting a Teen with Low Self Esteem
By
Oct 18, 2006, 21:22

Many teenagers today have low self esteem. This can go unnoticed by the people around them, who attribute it to the tough teen years. The kids go out and try to find other ways to pump up their feelings about themselves. Lots of times this can lead them into trouble with a capitol T.

You can look for symptoms of low self esteem in your own children by paying attention to the signs.

1. Assertiveness
Some people just seem to be natural born leaders, and others seem to be born to follow. Teenagers with low self esteem will usually be followers. Now just because someone is not an assertive type, or the president of the junior class, it doesn't necessarily mean their esteem is low. But it is a symptom to watch out for.

Look for uncertainty or fear in your teen. If they cannot make a decision about anything, it may be they do not trust themselves to make the right decision. Try to help them by letting them make some decisions for the family, even if it is as simple as what movie to watch. When they make a decision, praise them. Let them know they do have good judgment and taste. It is difficult to be a teenager, and afraid to look silly or wrong.

2. Sexually Promiscuous

If you think your teenager may be promiscuous, it could mean they feel this is the only way they can be accepted and loved. Unfortunately, if usually has the opposite effect, and makes them feel more worthless and used.

Often these teenagers are very insecure and trying to prove they can be cool. Peer pressure is intense during these young years, and if their friends are having sex, they may too, just to fit in with the crowd. This can be a difficult situation for a parent to notice. I

It may be good to talk with a counselor or therapist to try and help your teenager see that this is not the way to go. You may become angry, and that is not the best way to deal with the situation.

3. Joining a gang
Every parent fears this today, gangs are not just in the ghettos anymore. They are in just about every town in the country. Teenagers with low self esteem are looking to fit in somewhere, and a gang may look like the answer to them. Once you are in, you are like family, and gangs also portray an aura of power to someone who feels powerless.

Gangs prey on the weakness of others, and if your child feels weak, it may seem cool to them to be able to pick on someone else as a means of elevating their esteem. This is another situation where a counselor or therapist may be a good idea. The mind set of a gang turns the members away from people on the outside, including parents.

If you see your child depressed or sad, make sure there is a reason for it. Don't let the signs of low self esteem escape your attention. It is so important for kids today to feel good about themselves. It is a tough world out there, and it will only get harder for them to navigate in society if they are not happy with themselves now.

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