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Last Updated: Jul 2nd, 2008 - 21:15:22 |
Guilt if the worst things a Mom can feel. Mom's seem to think they are Super Woman. You want to be there for everyone, you want to do everything for your children and family. You can't Mom, it will not work.
You need to realize that you cannot do everything for your children, or your husband. When you try, don't you feel like you didn't quite do it all.
Guess what Mom, you cannot control everything, even if you try. You need to remember that. Things will happen, whether you want them to or not. If your child falls and hurts himself, you may thing that it is your fault, but it's not. Kids get bumps and bruises. It is a part of childhood no one can prevent. You can only do your best, but it will happen.
You must trust in yourself. You are the best Mom your child can have. It's not easy, and we all pray for patience sometimes. Be firm, but loving. Sometimes, even though we don't want to, parents have to say no. Your child can be upset with you, but he will get over it. Try to distract him, You know that everything your child wants to do is not good for him, so it is in his best interest for you to say no. He has to learn he cannot do anything he wants. Set fair, but firm limits.
Don't think your depriving him, your not. You are guiding him. That is what good Moms do. You will know deep inside when you have made the right choice, because you will be happy with it.
Don't let your kids make you feel guilty. If you say no, or make a decision they do not like, it is okay. Your the Mom, and the decision you have made will only have your child's best interests in mind. You know what is best for them. They do not.
Let them know that you will not change your mind. If you say no, and then always give in, your teaching your child a poor lesson. Let him know there are rules and boundaries set by you and he must follow them.
Never let anyone tell you that the choices you have made are wrong. They may not be right for someone else, but they are right for you. Sometimes people think the choices they have made are right for everyone, but that doesn't mean they are, does it?
If you feel unsure of a decision you have to make, ask a valued friends advice, someone who's opinion you respect. But never feel that you should be made to feel bad about something by a butt-in-ski. You can just ignore advice from anyone who's opinion you did not ask for.
Your parenting skills may not be perfect, no one's really are. There is not school we can go to to get a degree in Momming. This is something that is instinctual in us, and develops through time. It comes from our own opinions, and thoughts, and values. No one can tell us what is right, except us.
Think about how many times you have seen it happen, Mom comes home from work, the kids do a great job of laying a guilt trip on her, and they go buy something. The Mom is buying her children's happiness, and in the long run this is not good for them.
Your children are your most precious treasures. Teach them respect, and value, and kindness. Let them know the guilt trip will not work on you.
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