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Last Updated: Jul 2nd, 2008 - 21:15:22 |
(ARA) - The latest headlines have hit close to home for millions of kids and parents across the country. Another fatal school shooting. Could something have been done to prevent it? We’ll never know, but there are specific steps parents, educators and others can take to prevent a similar tragedy from happening in their community – and to comfort kids across the country who may be worried that their school might be the next Columbine.
One place anyone in the country can turn to for help is the children’s crisis charity KidsPeace (www.kidspeace.org). The 123-year-old nonprofit hosts many free resources to help resolve problems before they become overwhelming or dangerous.
For Parents
Talk to your kids about what has happened. Kids need to be reassured that their school is a safe place and they need not fear for their lives. C.T. O’Donnell II, president and CEO of KidsPeace, and the clinical experts at KidsPeace offer these tips to help parents put their kids’ minds at ease:
1. Listen to children. Allow them to express their concerns and fears.
2. Regardless of age, the most important issue is to reassure children of safety and security. Tell children that you, their school, their friends and their communities are all focused on their safety and that those around them are working for their safety. Have discussions about those dedicated to protecting them like police, teachers and other school officials, neighbors and all concerned adults throughout the community.
3. When discussing the events with younger children, the amount of information shared should be limited to some basic facts. Use words meaningful to them (not words like sniper, etc.). Share with them that some bad people have used violence to hurt innocent people. Do not go into specific details.
4. School-aged children will ask, "Can this happen here, or to me?" Do not lie to children. Share that it is unlikely that anything like this will happen to them or in their community. Then reiterate how the community is focused on working to keep everyone safe in the community.
5. Parents, caregivers and teachers should be cautious of permitting young children to watch news or listen to radio that is discussing or showing carnage. It is too difficult for most of them to process. Personal discussions are the best way to share information with this group. Also, plan to discuss this many times over the coming weeks.
6. When discussing the events with preteens and teens, more detail is appropriate, and many will already have seen news broadcasts. Do not let them focus too much on graphic details. Rather, elicit their feelings and concerns and focus your discussions on what they share with you. Be careful of how much media they are exposed to. Talk directly with them about the tragedy and answer their questions truthfully.
7. Although teens are more mature, do not forget to reassure them of their safety and your efforts to protect them. Regardless of age, kids must hear this message.
8. Be on the lookout for physical symptoms of anxiety that children may demonstrate. They may be a sign that a child, although not directly discussing the tragedy, is very troubled by the recent events. Talk more directly to children who exhibit these signs: headaches, excessive worry, stomachaches, increased arguing, back aches, irritability, trouble sleeping or eating, loss of concentration, nightmares, withdrawal, refusal to go to school and clinging behavior.
9. Parents and caregivers should often reassure children that they will be protected and kept safe. During tragedies like these, words expressing safety and reassurance with concrete plans should be discussed.
10. If you are concerned about your children and their reaction to stressful situations, talk directly with their school counselor, family doctor, local mental health professional or have your older children visit KidsPeace's teen-help Web site, www.teencentral.net which provides anonymous and clinically-screened help and resources for teen problems before they become overwhelming.
For Kids
KidsPeace and top children’s experts including Dr. Alvin Poussaint from Harvard and Dr. Lewis Lipsitt of Brown University have created a unique free Web site, www.TeenCentral.net that allows older kids and teens to work through emotional stresses -- before those stresses become dangerous or overwhelming. The site helps kids identify the problems they face, from depression to school pressures, peer problems, family disputes, drugs, alcohol, smoking, even suicidal thoughts or thoughts of harming others. TeenCentral.net has prevented a number of mass tragedies, including school shootings, as well as an uncountable number of personal ones.
For Schools
To help school systems see the early warning signs of danger and deal with the psychological fallout of violent events, KidsPeace has online articles ( www.kidspeace.org ) from its national “Healing” magazine on “Why Kids Shoot Kids” and how to help kids cope with grief.
“The point is,” says O’Donnell, “there are resources that can save the lives of desperate kids who may hurt themselves or others when they think there is nowhere to turn for help. KidsPeace’s TeenCentral.net lets America’s kids know they are not alone and they can get help before their problems get too big for them to handle.”
“In many cases we get what amount to cries for help from children who are bullied, abused, alone and hurt,” says Herbert Mandell, M.D., medical director for KidsPeace and the KidsPeace Children’s Hospital. “We help those children with expert advice, comfort and resources. However, once in a while we see that circumstances are spinning out of control and we are able to prevent an even bigger tragedy. The key is to reach out to more kids under pressure and stop a bad situation from becoming a disaster for them . . . and for the rest of us.”
KidsPeace is a 123-year-old national children’s crisis charity dedicated to giving hope, help and healing to children facing crisis. With more than 50 centers nationwide, KidsPeace directly helps thousands of children a day with life-saving treatment to overcome the crises of growing up. With the help of VIP leaders, including its national spokesperson Leeza Gibbons and kid safety icon RETRO BILL, KidsPeace helps millions more each year through educational outreach and awareness programs designed to help America’s kids and parents anticipate, intervene in and master crises that can affect any child -- from disasters and personal traumas to family issues and neglect to life-threatening depression, eating disorders and the many stresses of modern life.
KidsPeace was named “The Outstanding Organization” of its kind in the country by the American Association of Psychiatric Services for Children and was called “a prototype of what we need for all children everywhere” by the late, nationally renowned child and family expert, Dr. Lee Salk. Courtesy of ARA Content
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